National Grief Awareness Day | Keeping our loved one’s memory alive

The word grief holds many connotations for different people, but what does it mean and where does it come from?  The word itself means to make heavy or weighty, something that only scratches the surface of grief's reality for families who have experienced the death of their child.  

At Demelza we understand that everyone’s experience is unique, and we believe that there is no one way, or right way to manage it. Psychotherapeutic Practice Manager, Jennie Steer shares: “I don’t think grief ever goes away. I think it’s always there. We may grow around our grief, potentially, but it will always be there. In order to feel grief, you need to have loved and it’s really important that you keep your loved one’s memory close to you.” 

When losing a loved one, we may feel consumed by it or that we have the weight of the world on our shoulders. This is why it is important that we are there for those experiencing loss. One way in which we help to take those memories and make them last a lifetime, is through our special remembrance events. 

These events are a time for parents and carers to reflect, reminisce and celebrate the life of their child in the company of their family. They incorporate elements such as lighting candles, placing flowers, listening to music, creating memory art as well as other seasonal elements. 

“The memory making that we offer will be something they can cherish forever and have in their homes. We offer these opportunities to every family at end of life or post bereavement, whether they are a resident at the hospice or at a funeral directors, we can make sure those opportunities are offered out to everybody,” said Jennie. 

These events are led by families and what they feel is the best way to honour their child’s memory as Jennie explains: “I think it is really important that the families we work with steer what we do. That is one thing that we are really passionate about, making sure we are listening to family voices and doing what they want us to do. Each family will receive a named keepsake in memory of their child and that is really special. Even if they do not want to come to the event itself, because that feels too difficult, we would still offer them a keepsake after the event so that everyone is included.” 

In July our team held its annual Memory Day, which allowed family members to sit and reflect on the incredible memories they have to cherish. "Demelza is a very special place for us to visit. I cried, but they were happy tears thinking of the memories I have. It was good to see and be with other families" – a family supported by Demelza.